Surely this thread should have seen some activity since New Year's Eve?

Surely this thread shouldnt have seen any action since 1995!

Watch this space for an in-depth analysis on the upcoming fixture on the 1st Feb.
The opposition on that date are a team in free fall so it shouldn't be much of a problem for Blackburn, except that after their exit from the FA Cup, Newcastle will be focusing all their energy on attaining mid-table mediocrity.

Something Blackburn can only dream of

We shall see what happens on 1st Feb if you are still in business by then and Ewood Park hasnt been turned into a KFC!

There was panic amongst the good citizens of Blackburn this week when astronomers announced that a large falling object would crash into the town on Wednesday night.
Scientists have named the object 'Newcastle United' and have calculated precisely the point of impact as the pitch of Ewood Park football stadium and thousands will be turning up to witness the spectacle.

Ha ha! I supppose some of you thought that an object really was going to crash to earth, but no, it was just a joke to illustrate the plight that Toon find themselves in.
After a meteoric rise up the table early in the season Newcastle reverted to norm with a series of results which left them bottom of the Form League, culminating in an embarrassing exit from the FA Cup at the hands of Brighton (Brighton for fuck's sake!!!).
Fans who were deluded enough to dream of the Champions League are now saying that a top-ten finish was all that could have been expected from this squad, but unless they can pick themselves up even that might be too much for them.

Yes (you say) but wait until we get our african stars back then we'll show ya!
Maybe, but you've got to ask yourselves whether 2 or 3 weeks in the heat of west africa is good preperation for a cold winter night in east lancashire?

But if Newcastle are crap then what about Rovers? The table doesn't lie and Blackburn's position down at the bottom certainly tells a tale.
Oh yes, Rovers have been unlucky this season, but they say that luck evens itself out over the season in which case Blackburn are due for the Mother Of All Surges!
With the deadwood of Jason Roberts and Keith Andrews no longer holding them back there'll be no stopping Steve Kean's boys from picking up Three Easy Points!

Entertaining as ever but I wouldn't waste your energy next time, and dare I say it, how you missed Jason Roberts tonight!

6 easy points

You've got to hand it to Pardew, he got his tactics spot-on last night.
All week Steve Kean had been training up his boys for an encounter with a quality team, a team full of skill and guile, a team battling it out with the likes of Arsenal and Liverpool near the top of the Prem.
So what does Pards do? Of course he tells his men to go out and play like crap!
This had the effect of making the Rovers players wonder if they'd turned up on the right night and so distracted them that they were unable to score even from chances handed to them on a plate!
Brilliant!

5th Spot!!!!

They're wrong though.

We had a 10cm fall of snow in the night and the temperature this morning was zero, but this was as nothing compared with cold wind of relegation blowing through the gilded corridors of Ewood Park as the results came through this weekend.
With Wigan, QPR & Bolton all winning, Rovers have been pulled right back into the mix.
Last week they were unlucky to be playing against Bolton right after the Muamba business and were in effect beaten by a guy lying in a hospital bed!
Cynics amongst you will display no surprise at this, reflecting that a team of grannies from the Alzheimers ward could beat Blackburn, but it's not true I tell you, IT'S NOT TRUE!!
Anyway Rovers need a result tonight to keep out of the bottom three - let's see, who are they playing?
Oh yes, Manchester United!
After the shocking events at Old Trafford when they came away with Three Easy Points, Rovers are on the verge of doing The Double over the Champions.
The last time this happened was in the season of 2005/6 and I well remember the epic game at Ewood Park when the Rovers came out 4-3 winners - thanks to a David Bentley (where is he now?) hattrick - in one of the most exciting matches I've ever seen.
Can Steve Kean conjure up the spirit of those Glory Days?
Don't bother pondering too long on this question, I know the answer is: Absolutely No Way!
So how are Blackburn going to get anything from this game?
It's not going to be down to Kean's tactics or the Rovers players or even the United players - it's going to be down to Fate!
With Citeh slipping up everybody's saying how a United win tonight will see them with the Title within their grasp.
This is just the type of situation where Fate takes a hand and knocks you on the head and that's why Manchester 'Fucking' United are going to slink home with their tails between their legs wandering what they have to do to win the Title.
Another Three Easy Points to Rovers!

Haha. Very good.

4-0 Man Utd win.

I'm predicting three goals and three easy points for Blackburn against Liverpool at Ewood Park.

Thank-you Mr WUM, but on this thread it's no good coming in just like that and giving some prediction without explaining in detail how you came to your conclusion.
You need to have an extensive knowledge of the clubs, their history and traditions - for instance how will Rovers 6-2 victory over Liverpool in the equivalent fixture on 6.9.1913 affect the way the teams approach the match tonight? It's certainly something to ponder.
You've got to weigh up the merits of each of the teams, taking into account the squads, injuries, suspensions, form, team morale etc, etc.
To a casual observer it might seem that Blackburn's morale would be rock-bottom considering their League position, but the situation is quite the opposite and the Rovers players are up for it every time they take to the pitch, while everbody knows that Liverpool's morale is so low that <insert your own punch line here>.
And what about the managers? Do you even know who the respective managers are? Well I'll tell you - the Liverpool manager is Mr Kenny Dalglish and the Blackburn manager is Mr Steve Kean (yes I know - I'm a smartass).
The only thing these guys have in common is that they're both of the scottish persuasion - but I've never seen either of them in a kilt.
Although they both took over in similar circumstances one was hailed as the new Messiah, while the other was denounced as a back-stabbing Judas!
How things have changed - now 'King' Kenny is on the verge of being deposed, while Kean has gained the respect of all and sundry - especially those who don't support Rovers!
So, only after careful consideration and an intelligent weighing up of all the factors mentioned above can we conclude that Liverpool are in fact shite and will be no match for a determined Rovers team tonight.
And now you can say it: Three Easy Points!